A Link to Look At

I'm not crazy about posting video after video, but there are a couple I thought I'd throw your way while you're leaning back in the chair, stuffed from Thanksgiving.

First, in honor of the Ten-Year-Anniversary of The Matrix, there's a cool video of that infamous scene where Neo dodges bullets for the first time - complete with cool Lego stop-motion action.




Now, with a hat-tip to the Eccles, here is the now infamous tribute to John Williams, the Star Wars song.


Of course, that's not the only version of the Star Wars song.

• You click through to this one - one guy doing all four parts, with titles of the songs as each tune is sung.
• There's another guy doing the same thing, a little more laid back.
• Somebody did a version with pictures from the movies and fan sites.
• Then - there are LIVE versions - here's one from a high school talent show, and another probably from something similar with performers in Star Wars costumes.

Exodus: Plot, Community and Story

We're putting down a bookmark in the book of Exodus at Rivendell. We'll pick it back up after we spend the next few weeks in advent. But as we pause from Exodus, there are few thoughts I thought I'd share.

Plot
We're putting our bookmark in Exodus just after chapters 11 and 12. We've reached the apex of the plotline so far. God has been working powerfully in the lives of Moses and Aaron, the Hebrew people and in Egypt. Pharaoh has been resisting, responding to God out of his personality and power as tyrants often do - deepening his resolve against change. In the narrative, Moses sounds like he finally is understanding what God is doing and how unwilling Pharaoh is to change and how mighty of a hand God will have in freeing the people.

The plot and literary structure of chapter 12 in Exodus is very telling. The narrative almost sounds like a couple of different voices are now telling the story. We have our narrator telling us about the events of the final plague, right in the middle of the chapter. This sounds very much like the narration of the other plagues. It is distinctive in its form - neither Aaron nor Moses do anything to initiate the plague, no one raises their arms, strikes the ground or raises a staff. Also, Israel is kept from even seeing this plague in action - they are shut up in their homes with the doors closed - keeping watch, without watching. This is a simple telling of a terrible happening, one that results in a great cry in Egypt, unlike any has been before.

But on both side of that narration, the plot is laced with elements of ritual, liturgy and worship. Exodus almost seems to go out of its way to surround the event of the plauge with worship and ritual. That makes sense. This event is remembered by Jews worldwide as a ritual celebration and liturgical event. The Sedar is a supremely ceremonious event, rich in symbolism, overflowing with the tastes and experiences of the people, rich with memory and faith. Perhaps the only way this moment can be rightly known is through the worship and liturgy of a community.

Community
There are some things and moments and tastes of life that really can only be learned and known through community. Information is easy to pass on, knowledge can be learned in books or urls. But wisdom and memory and knowing can't just be 'looked up' or downloaded or memorized. They are encountered and heard and tasted from others.

When we came to the plagues of Egypt in our study, instead of a lecture to cover these events, we turned to one another. Members of our community each took one of the first nine plagues and found a way to communicate, share and experience that particular happening. It was an incredible experience, very diverse, very different and yet amazingly unified and meaningful. Just to give you a taste of the morning (Without trying to truly summarize which would woefully shallow it out regardless of how many words I used) Angela talked about the plague of frogs through the lens of a professor/student, my wife utilized imagery, sound, movement and the kids to infest us with flies, Dave created poetry that both modernized the death of the livestock and simultaneously brought to the table some historical and textual criticism, and Kevin and Chris touched our souls with a song about the ninth plague of darkness.

The wisdom and memory of those events was shared - not just in the facts of the events or the narrative being passed on - but in the memory of how it was shared and through the personal eyes and ears of each person who shared. Their faces, their ideas, their creativity, their own personalizations and life experiences gave everything a depth and a knowing that can't be typed or read.

Story
Such is the wisdom the Passover meal itself and the way that Exodus remembers and insists on the retelling of the death of the firstborn. This is to passed on from generation to generation as a story - a story for the community of faith. This is to be known through eating, sharing, telling, tasting, hearing and knowing. The events of the plague aren't enough, the story has to be told. The songs have to be sung. The liturgy has to be read. Remembering is a way of being drawn into the story and seeing things and knowing things beyond just facts and figures.

We learn in this story that human beings react when God's hand pushes us - either with repentance or with resistance. And those responses have enormous consequences in life - just ask the people of Pharoah. We learn that God refuses to leave us in the mistakes and misunderstandings of our past - just ask Moses. We learn through this story how God uses relationships we never saw coming to prepare us and send us into mission - just ask Aaron.

And we learn in this story that often the greatest challenge God calls us to is the challenge of belief. Just ask anyone who has spent the night huddled in a room with blood-painted doors, waiting and watching for deliverance.

Part of the Conspiracy

For a couple years now, Rivendell has been a part of the Advent Conspiracy. We've completely enjoyed this and have found it has really shaped our community and impacted how our families engage our culture and the obsession with the Christmas season.

First, a little vocabulary.

• Advent - a season of preparation; a time to get ready for the coming of Christ. Advent a liturgical celebration on the four Sunday immediately before Christmas. Its probably more familiar to you if you grew up going to a mainline denominational church, less so if you come from traditions with less emphasis on liturgy.

• Conspiracy - plotting together, planing together; an active, collective resistance or refusal.

As a Community of Faith...
We have talked repeatedly in our gatherings about the way that we are sometimes overwhelmed by the rush, rush, rush of the holiday season. Even more, we've talked about the ways that marketing and consumerism drive us to spend and buy, not just for the sake of gift-giving, but directly associate spending with hope, life, happiness, and love. One after another the advertisements promise that the good life is out there for the buying. Decorated with creative design and clever tag-lines, idolatry never looked better.

The Advent Conspiracy has been a great corrective for us - reminding us in clear terms that the story of the birth of Christ has been hijacked, manipulated, merchandised and put up for sale. And year after year people try over and over to find life at Christmas, all the while looking past the presence and life of Christ.

Being able to talk about this together, to process and share our experiences as a community has been so helpful. The discussion, honesty and transparency has been affirming and empowering for us as we rethink our mindset about the season and re-teach ourselves and our children. And walking through this together as a community has created all kinds of space for people to learn at their own pace, look into their lives and introduce other friends and family to what we're learning.

As a family...
Around our house, we have completely changed the way we approach Christmas. We create a budget of what we think we used to spend on the Holiday season. We add up travel expenses, gift buying, gift-shipping, cards, wrapping paper, everything. Then, we've established a few new traditions around some gifts we create and make in our own home that take a little bit of planning and legwork, but not nearly as much cash. We create these gifts and share them with others. We also plan some special family times both with close family and friends, and alone together to celebrate the season, including reading a birth narrative, talking about what those shepherds must have been thinking, and looking for someone else we can love on during this time of the year.

Its a long journey to rethink these holidays. The push against us into spending and looking for happiness in a wrapped gift or finding love through a wallet is so powerful and prevalent. It taps into the natural human gravitational pull towards selfishness and we fall for it so easily. But the conspiracy is alive in our home - an active resistance of the powers that be, and a commitment to never again let ourselves miss celebrating the birth of our Savior.

Get Involved

Want to make this happen in your home? In your church? There's plenty of help available.

• Start at the Advent Conspiracy home page. They've got all kinds of resources available including videos, readings, teaching, and more.
• Want to plan some Advent activities around your house? Here are links to some sites, including one from the ELCA, a Reformed resource, Calvin Institute, and a bunch of links here. Some of these are older, but they're still great places to start.
• [update] Johnny Baker has a list of great resources for Advent. (ht to Andrew Jones)
  
• Take some time to read through a birth narrative - Mathew and Luke are where you want to start. Take turns reading, take your time. And I'd recommend reading out of a translation that sounds like a story for this, like The Message or the New Living Translation. Biblegateway.com has everything you need on line.
  

The Missing Links

Its been a while, and I know how much you've missed them. So without further ado, here a few clicks and tricks for your weekend enjoyment:

• So the NFL has been busy this week. They've made way too much out of Chad 85's little joke. Really? A $200,000 fine for what was obviously a joke from a known jester? I understand that these athletes are at least at some level expected to be professionals, but this is too far. I get the fine on Cutler for his comments to a judge. But the NFL has a mind for fines that defies logic sometimes. These are the folks who fined Atlanta's head coach for defending a player, but not the opposing Panther Hall who started the whole thing. Of course, working at the NFL office demands a certain hermeneutic of suspicion to begin with, particular with creative marketing agents trying to sneak around actually paying for advertising with the NFL. At least Mark Sanchez knows how to make amends and do some good in the midst of the NFL's 7-ring circus.
  

• Staying with a theme of injustice, a judge in Phoenix has ordered a church to shut down a pancake breakfast for the hungry, because their concern for others is hurting the home resale value of the neighborhood. Guess that's what Jesus meant when he told us to love our neighbors.
  

• This is probably old news for most folks, but Google is coughing up some cash to put free Wi-Fi in a lot of airports. Travelers with toys I'm sure will be grateful. But it begs the question why free wi-fi isn't more readily available. When I helped my friend Blake Ewing open his new, very cool, great-pizza restaurant downtown, we just assumed that we would have folks in the restaurant from time to time opening up laptops to get some work done in the afternoons. Yet, tons of great places don't do the wi-fi thing. Why? Still an unfathomable mystery.

• Want to know how the ancient Hebrew people describe in your Bible viewed the cosmos? Checkout this great conceptualization. Coolistic, huh?

• Cross-stitching with a generous sense of humor - follow the link.

• Of course, if you're not the laughing type, always a little grumpy, that may be good for you. There's something ironic about that, and I find that funny.

• My friends at Disney are giving their favorite pet mouse a makeover. This could go well. Of course, people said the same thing about New Coke too.
  

• With the holiday season approach, you're probably thinking about all the people you want to buy gifts for. Stop it - don't think about spending money, make gifts, and give the money to others as a gift to God. Check out the Advent Conspiracy. I'll do more on [AC] later, probably next week.
  

• But, sense you're thinking about buying gifts, for the Trekker who has everything else, shoes to fit the uniform! Or for your friend who plants a garden every year and is also a huge Star Wars fan, a Jawa for the Garden!

• And speaking of Star Wars, ever wonder how those briefing graphics of the trench on the Death Star were created? Old technology always amazes me.

• Ever seen the forecaster on your local news just mailing it? I know, its sometimes a boring job. Sure, they overdo it when they actually might have something to talk about, trying to over-dramatize it and milk the spotlight for all its worth. But here's a guy showing you how to make it work when you've been saying the same thing over and over for a while - dance to the weather cast!

Crowder and How He Loves

There are some teachers, poets, artists and performers who just get through my defenses and deflections every time.

David Crowder belongs to that group.

These words just penetrate my busyness, pride and constant insecurity and remind me to whom I belong and what it means, at least in part, to belong to God.

"He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree, Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy." "And we are His portion and He is our prize, Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes, If his grace is an ocean, we're all sinking. And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss, And my heart turns violently inside of my chest, I don't have time to maintain these regrets, When I think about, the way... That He loves us, Oh how He loves us, Oh how He loves us"

[For the record, while I've enjoyed concerts/worship with Crowder a couple of times - I've still never caught them in Tulsa - I keep missing them or being away or just not knowing! Argh!]

12 Years Ago

For me to have trouble sleeping on any given night doesn't necessarily indicate anything in particular. But, with regularity, each year since 1997, I have had trouble going to sleep on November 4th. Its a habit that started in Amarillo, Texas, in Baptist-St. Anthony's Hospital, and that I think is at least sub-consciously now a ritual for me.

On November 4th, around 6:30 pm, my very pregnant wife did that pregnant waddle up to me and told me that it was probably time for us to go to the Hospital. We grabbed the pre-packed bags, fed the cat, locked the doors and then drove off. We checked into the maternity ward somewhere around 7:00 pm. We had no twitter account or blog or fancy instant messaging technology back in those days kids, so we did what old-timers still do when they hit a big event in life, we made a few phone calls telling people where we were, including my wife's OBGYN (his name is Mike Williams - he's important later in the story).

Within half an hour our doctor, a good friend and a parent of a great young man (now part of a church planting team) came in the room, checked some vitals and signed the order for my wife's epidural.

Everything to this point has gone exactly as we have expected. We're in the room, future grand-parents know the baby is coming, the doctor is ready, the nurses and ready, Mommy and Daddy are ready. Green light is on, the word is given, everything is a go.

Except the baby. In an clear foreshadowing of her do-it-myself nature, she wasn't having any of it yet. She was warm and comfortable and no intention of rushing out her private womb.

For the next 11 hours through the night, I waited. I paced, I prayed, I read, I ate and waited. We had a few wonderful friends around to help, including our dear friend Nancy Stepp, a vision of God's compassion and wisdom in our lives. I played cards, I talked, I walked around, I read every little readout of every little gadget in the hospital room, including the one that goes 'ping.'

I stayed up all night, watching and waiting. My wife, you know the person in our marriage who actually had the baby inside her - the one giving birth - the one who supposedly has to do all the work, she slept. Like a log. Nancy got to hear her snore even.

Finally, after a night of worrying, thinking, praying, trusting, relaxing and more, finally, around 6:30 am the whole birth process finally moved into second and then third gear. And then around 7:30 that morning, she was born.

And for a moment, a brief second, we thought she wasn't ever going to be. [Even more back story] Early on in the pregnancy my wife had gotten a few 'warning signs' that brought us a little alarm - nothing that was medically threatening - but in your first pregnancy, almost anything unexpected or out of the ordinary concerns you a little.

Then, as our daughter was born, as she our Doctor pulled her away from her Mother, the baby was completely silent. Where was the crying I expected? I could see far better than my wife could. And this little girl was purple-gray, almost charcoal in color. She didn't move, she didn't cry. Every muscle in my body tightened; a horrible knot in my throat closed up.

But, just as my mind and soul were about to burst into fears of the worst possible scenarios, I noticed our Doctor. Dr. Williams was as calm and cool as the Milkman on Monday morning. There was no tension in his face, no urgency in his step, no tightness in has voice. His peace gave me peace. He very calmly wiped off the new baby, suctioned out her nose and mouth, reached in her mouth his finger to clear a little obstruction...

And the she sang her first song. That morning, November 5th, we got meet our sweet little girl for the first time.

Today she turns 12. And I'm still meeting her anew each day.

O God my Father,

I am so blessed and honored and humbled to a part of this young woman's life. She reminds of you and your presence in my life practically every day.
I have never been the mentor, teacher and guide to her that I have dreamed of being. I continue to lack your patience, to resist your compassion, to miss your leadings and to forget all that you have taught me through the years. And yet you take my meager offerings to you and to her and you do amazing things in her life. As she has lived and learned and loved she is already more fully living into what you long for us to be than I am.

The years ahead bring more questions than answers, more turbulence than calm and more than their fair share of concerns, anxiety, and uncertainty. I pray you would give our family your wisdom as we live together, more opportunities to join you in mission and a willingness to trust you more than we trust ourselves.

As my daughter writes the next chapter of her story, would you continue to stand with her, to walk beside her, to protect and deepen her soul, to open her mind and heart to you, and to open her eyes and ears to the world you love.

As I promised you that morning twelve years ago, she is yours, not mine. I am just so grateful you continue to let me feel your mercy in her hugs, to hear your wisdom in her thoughts, your creativity in her questions, your passion in her will and your love through her to me, her family and returned to you.

A Few Good Words

The past couple weeks have been, um, challenging to say the least. And somehow, God has managed to draw my eyes to a few words and phrases that have really come at the right time. They're not all terribly deep or even theological, but at the right moment they made a difference on my mindset and focus. I can't share them all, but here are a few:


"L8tr, G8tr H8tr" - in a text from my youngest brother. Texts and conversations from my brothers are almost always a pick-me-up and put a smile on my face. No one makes me laugh like they do. Brook and I were texting about my daughter's upcoming birthday (still a few shopping days until Nov 5) and he signed off with that phrase. Its not that big a deal, unless you're an Alabama fan and know that Tebow and the Gators are a sure test laying in wait for you at the end of the season if we can stay focused and unbeaten - and because you're a Bama fan, you generally hate the Gators anyway. Thanks for the laugh and understanding Brook.

In explaining to sports to a mutual friend, a buddy of mine told a female friend the following: "Sports are soap operas for guys." Okay, normally, I wouldn't necessarily agree with that. Except in the headlines these past couple weeks have been the bad umpiring by the MLB refs, all the drama around the opening of Basketball season (which is apparently 17 months long each year) and the whole Brett Favre going back to Green Bay.

This quote is on the wall of a men's restroom at The Bros. Houligan. Read and enjoy:
"Change: When the winds of change blow hard enough, the most trivial of things can turn into deadly projectiles."
Forgive me for not elaborating, but besides the humor and general truthiness of it, the axiom touched a tender spot and spoke volumes.

Coop had a link to someone quoting Henri Nouwen in one of his contextless link posts - and I find it deep appropriate as well:

When we say, "I love Jesus, but I hate the Church," we end up losing not only the Church but Jesus too. The challenge is to forgive the Church. This challenge is especially great because the Church seldom asks us for forgiveness, at least not officially. But the Church as an often fallible human organization needs our forgiveness, while the Church as the living Christ among us continues to offer us forgiveness. Here's that original post.

And, to ponder, reflect and sit with - a stanza from a song written by my friends Chris and Kevin Skillern, who the whole worlds knows as Scales of Motion:

We danced and sang songs of praise,
We basked in the glow of the Holy One, the Son at the center,
Whose light we're made to absorb and reflect.
We shine brightest as constellations.
How can we shine when the walls we build
Keep the Son from getting in and us from getting out?

Exodus: A little detail

I love the little, intricate details available in study of the ancient texts. And I know, when I teach I can easily get bogged down in dirty, archaic, remote and even trivial little details and bore everyone while I geek out on it.

So, instead of taking 46 weeks to teach through Exodus, I'll just spam you these posts. Hit delete if you like, or, read ahead and join the discussion.

4:18 (ESV) - Moses went back to Jethro his father-in-law and said to him, "Please let me go back to my brothers in Egypt to see whether they are still alive." And Jethro said to Moses, "Go in peace."

There's much more going on in this one verse than meets the eye. Like that comment from a conversation going on next to you that you unintentionally overheard, there is so much happening underneath this that you kind of have to already know to get. Some of it is obvious. Going back to his Father-in-law is at least awkward, if not very difficult emotiionally. Jethro and Moses have enjoyed a very particular arrangement for all these many years (as many as 40 according to some commentaries). Jethro took Moses in when he was a wanderer and foreigner, alone and humbled. Jethro has become a mentor and his family as the father of Zipporah. This is where Moses has discovered the faith of his family and the stories and promises of Abraham and Isaac and Jacob. Leaving such a relationship, breaking camp when its been the safest place in your life, must be difficult for both of them.

And that last phrase about his brothers, the thought of going back to Egypt to see if they are still alive, harkens back to the Joseph narrative and the going back to Canaan to see if Jacob is still alive. Joseph sees to his family and brings them into Egypt, Moses will complete this story line and see to his family and bring them out of Egypt and back to the promised land (or at least to the border before he passes). This reminds that all of us are living within stories that are bigger than just what's going on in our lives at this moment. My story is bigger than my job, my kids or the weather outside today. My story is bigger than just my lifetime. In some ways, my life and my story are informed and shaped by a wider story about the experiences and journey of the people before me, the culture and people to which I belong and the movement of God and experiences of life on a much larger stage than I see usually in my day-to-day vision.

4:19-20 - And the LORD said to Moses in Midian, "Go back to Egypt, for all the men who were seeking your life are dead." ²⁰So Moses took his wife and his sons and had them ride on a donkey, and went back to the land of Egypt. And Moses took the staff of God in his hand."

God reminds Moses again that his life is no longer in jeopardy, perhaps to also continue to reshape Moses' self-understanding and sense of identity. There is a continual thread through the remainder of this narrative that God is continually calling Moses back to himself, back to God, and into seeing himself "through Heaven's eyes." (with apologies to the songwriters from Prince of Egypt).

Moreover, there is something significant about Moses bringing that staff with him. Yes, of course, its what God told him to do. And repeatedly throughout the canon there is a constant call for us to live a life of faithfulness and obedience to God. But the narrator could have just told us that Moses took his staff or even 'that staff.' The emphasis here is on "the staff of God in his hand." Moses carries with him this staff, this symbol of God's call in his life, God's power, God's authority. Moses isn't just taking a new family into this mission, but also a new strength - one from God. Moses now is walking in the strength of God as he heads back to Egypt.

Wow, there's so much that we could talk about there, right? What does it mean to walk in God's strength? How does one walk if one carries the staff of God? What does God expect us to do when God grants us his presence, his strength?

²¹"And the LORD said to Moses, "When you go back to Egypt, see that you do before Pharaoh all the miracles that I have put in your power. But I will harden his heart, so that he will not let the people go." (ESV)

Lots of folks get hung up on this piece of the story - this idea that God is forcing Pharaoh to play a role in this drama and then punishing and destroying him like a puppet. I think there's a very different perspective here, but its hard for us to see, partly because of translation issues, and partly due to assumptions we may already have. I'm going to share an extensive quote from Robert Alter's translation and commentary, The Five Books of Moses.

4:21 - This phrase, "I will toughen his (Pharaoh's) heart", which shows up a couple of different ways in the narrative, has been the source of volumes of exposition, introspection and theological wrangling. Is Pharaoh his own man, or a puppet on a string? Why does God punish him if God is causing his response? The heart in biblical idiom is the seat of understanding, feeling and intention. "The verb rendered here as 'toughen' ('harden' in KJV) has the primary meaning of to strengthen, and the most frequent synonym of this idiom as it occurs later in the story means literally 'to make heavy.' God needs Pharaoh's stubborn, unbroken will in order that He may deploy the impending plagues, one after another, thus humiliating the great imperial power of Egypt - the burden of the triumphalist narrative - and demonstrating the impotence of all the gods of Egypt. But Pharaoh is presumably manifesting his own character, callousness, resistance to instruction, and arrogance would all be implied by the toughening of his heart. God is not so much pulling a marionette's strings as allowing, or perhaps encouraging, the oppressor-king to persist in his habitual harsh willfulness and presumption." (Alter, 329-330)

God is pushing, pulling, shoving on Pharaoh's heart, fanning into flame what is there so that God may be revealed. When pushed against a wall, we reveal our inner nature, our way of facing the world. God knows who Pharaoh is inside and out - and knows how powerful, controlling people act when they are pushed to the brink. God's words "I will harden Pharaoh's heart" would be better rendered, "I will push Pharaoh's to the limit and then show you and him who I am" except, that's obviously an interpretation much more than a translation.

Exodus: The God Who is Seen and Unseen

Notice what God hints at in 4:14-15 and then the narrator shows us in 4:27 [here are those texts] - God has been working in ways that have been completely hidden from our eyes. Moses has a brother who has survived Pharaoh's attacks on the Israelite infants and who is not only alive in slavery, but who has a voice that is heard by fellow children of Abraham. From our perspective as hearers of the story - this is almost a Hollywood sudden plot twist. Now Moses has a brother - someone who is on his side, supporting his call to service and who can make up for what Moses lacks, who can compliment his availability to God and familiarity with the house of Pharaoh. Now we have two people serving as voices of deliverance - Moses can speak Pharaoh's language and Aaron speaks with the Hebrews.

This is unexpected and surprising. And perhaps very familiar. This is what we know about God from the appearance of God in the bush - God is both seen and unseen, both revealed and still hidden. God shows up, speaks and yet is still mysterious and impossible to understand. Who God is in this way also embodies how God will act. God both reveals the plans and keeps some out of our view. God tells us and reveals this grand vision and plan, and yet is slow to tell us everything and let us know everything. We know this from our own perspective. How often has God surprised you with a friend you didn't know you had, with support you hadn't expected, with someone lending a hand that you would never have predicted?

At first, you might find that frustrating. Why is God holding back? We think that we like to know everything going into any decision. We act as if surprises are a threat or a breech of contract, as if knowing everything is both a prerequisite to our decisions and a requirement of our allegiance with anyone or anything. And on one hand, that makes sense. I expect my mortgage company to be completely transparent and forthcoming about all aspects of our relationship. I expect my doctor to tell me everything I need to know about what he sees on that X-ray, no surprises, no holding back, don't even grimace or groan without explaining.

But there are other times that telling me everything in advance isn't such a good idea. The most obvious example that jumps out is our relationships at home. Certainly my bride and I spent long hours in discovering one another, in learning about the other person, in lengthy times of honest revealing ourselves to one another. But thank goodness I didn't know everything ahead of time. If she had known then just how hard it would be to live with me day after day after day, if I had known then just how hard some of the changes required of me would be, we probably would never have met at the front of that church on July 22, 1994. We'd have run screaming away in the middle of the night. And there is something almost sweet and romantic discovering these things together, finding our way down these winding, hidden paths together. No, its not always easy, but in the honesty of trying together, the journey binds us together even more deeply than ever before.

The same is true about God and about how God chooses to both make known himself and his plans, and at the same time remain unseen, stay hidden and keep things back from us. This all makes sense if we understand what God is trying to grow in us - faith. More than information, more than knowing, more than our ability to have everything figured out, God calls us to trust, to believe and to have faith in Him and through Him. In fact, often our 'need' to know is really a lack of faith hidden in big words or an unwillingness to trust anyone besides ourselves.

I remember not that long ago getting the joyous opportunity to take my driving test again, at the age of 30. Long story cut short, when we moved to Oklahoma, because of a number of situations, I couldn't just apply for a new state's license, I had to drive with an examiner in the car. The older gentleman assigned to me was more accustomed to riding with 16-year-olds, but I think was grateful to be riding with an adult - both for the experience behind the wheel and the conversation. As we drove and he issued instructions (turn here, park there, merge next right...) he asked about my situation and learned that I was the teaching pastor of my church.

As we ended the examination, he smiled. He stared at me for a second and then said, "First, you passed, of course. Second, can I share a thought with you?" Well, what else was I going to say... I wanted my license. He leaned back in the passenger seat and this man probably 20 years ahead of me in life looked over at me and shared this: "Imagine if when you and I had gotten into your car this afternoon I had sat down and said, start the vehicle and proceed 100 feet to the stop sign. Then turn left into oncoming traffic and drive East for 125 yards. Then turn left at the intersection and head North for 35 yards. Then turn right into the right hand lane. Proceed for 50 feet then execute a lane change into the left-hand lane. At the following intersection turn left. Then proceed about 50 feet and then on the hill parallel park in the neighborhood. Then merge back into traffic and turn right at the next light. Proceed 125 yards.." On and on he went, rehearsing the exact path and movements we had just executed in the driving test (clearly he had every detail memorized). "Imagine I gave you the entire plan all up front. How would you have done on the test?"

My response was immediate, "I'd have failed. I wouldn't have remembered all the details, understood everything you were asking of me or fully known what to do and it probably would have felt overwhelming."

He grinned. "Aren't you glad God doesn't tell us everything up front? Even when we want him too."

Wow.

God, thank you for all the times you have been working behind the scenes, far from what I could see. Thank you for the people you have brought alongside that I would never have known to even look for. Thank you that you can see so much further and so much wider than I can even imagine. And thank you for how deeply faithful and trustworthy you are.

Exodus: Taking Things Off

We have a shoe basket at home - its more of an organizer than a decoration. We come home, put down the backpacks (all four of us carry things around in backpacks) and then we flip off (not like that) our shoes and toss them into the shoe basket. Its a sign we're home - the shoes are off. We have friends that do the same thing more or less, they take off their shoes as they enter their home.

So it grabs my attention that God tells Moses to take off his shoes as he enters this grotto or cave or nook where the Lord is appearing. [Here's the text from Exodus 3 in a few different translations] As Moses is getting his bearings and is trying to figure out what's going on here, God's voice interrupts his thoughts and curiosity. What's up with the shoes thing? What is it about Holy Ground that merits or demands or invites shoe removal?

I've read a lot of thoughts from a fairly diverse group of folks on this. One Rabbi reminds readers that removing your shoes is a sign of submission and respect to authority, kind of akin to people taking off their hats in a church. Another commentary suggests that shoes in ancient times were seen as a necessary evil - always filthy but needed - so removing them was common in religious places, much the way we shake off an umbrella or change out of work clothes before going somewhere special. Still another author see the shoes as a barrier - a layer of protection - which is no longer needed in a place that is made Holy by the presence of God. You don't need protection for your feet when God shows up in the room.

There is something humbling about taking off your shoes, isn't there? Most of us aren't terribly proud of our toes and feet. Foot care isn't necessarily the first thing we learn about our personal hygiene and we still live in a day and time when people may spend vast amounts of money to cover, clothe, decorate, accessorize and make a statement with the shoes they collect or wear.

Walking around barefoot is much more primitive. It almost comes across more Earthy to be in a cave talking to God with bare feet doesn't it? Almost more connected with the God of creation to be less protected from creation.

Whatever the case, God has Noah de-sandalize. And having to take something off to meet with God runs a very different direction from the way we put things for meeting with God. We put on Sunday best, our best smile, our thinking cap, our worship dance, our best songs, our musical excellence, our fancy slide, the best show we can create to meet with God.

So, Moses takes something off. Maybe there's a lesson to be learned there. And look where he is - outside, on a mountain, in the far-side of the wilderness. In the middle of nowhere, God shows up, and grabs his attention. This meeting is God's idea, God's little surprise for the prince-turned-outlaw-turned-shephered.

God shows up when God decides to, in ways that make sense (sometimes only) to God, and in ways and places that are often unexpected. As God is redirecting the life of this man and preparing him for the difficult road ahead, he draws Moses closer to Himself and sends him out to a mission for and with his people.

What would it look like if God showed up today in your life? What if instead of a burning bush God spoke out through the words of a friend, or through a work of art, or in a poem you wrote, or in a song you heard or in the voice of your child? What would you do with that? Would you notice? Would you stop? Would you hold still long enough to listen?

If it happens - if God interrupts your day or gives you a moment in the middle of traffic or shows up as your tucking someone in bed tonight - try this: take off your shoes. Stop what you're doing, put your bare feet out and pause to remember that God is near.

See what happens.

Exodus: Making Room for God

By the time we get to Exodus 2:23-25 and Exodus 3:1, Moses has had some time to nurtured and grown in the stories of God. Living in the family of a Priest in Midian serves as a place to stop and hear God, to be made ready for the future that Moses doesn't know is coming his way. He herds sheep, which means he spends a lot of time alone, thinking, remembering and wondering. As he's heard the stories of Abraham and Issac and Jacob, he's had time to stare at the sky, to think about those stories and to wonder what God is doing. These years that have gone by have given Moses a time and a place and a family where he can becoming open to what God is going to do. Also of note, he's become a shepherd, a vivid and frequent metaphor in scripture for being a leader (see Numb 27:17, 2 Sam 5:2, Jer 22:22, Eze 34:2 - also think of David - a shepherd before a King). Calling out and leading God's people will in many ways resemble herding sheep.

The mountain where Moses is shepherding in Exodus 3:1 is called "Horeb" or the Mountain of God. Horeb is the name for Mount Sinai. This gets called the Mountain of God here. It may not be called that as Moses is climbing up the mountain that morning, but he will know it to be the mountain of God as he climbs down that night. The narrator tips the reader/hearer off - God is here today.

Notice something that happens as the story is being told to us in verses 3 and 4:

³And Moses said, "I will turn aside to see this great sight, why the bush is not burned." ⁴When the LORD saw that he turned aside to see,^" God called to him^" out of the bush, "Moses, Moses!" And he said, "Here I am."

Anytime a phrase or word is repeated in Scripture, its worth your time and attention to re-read it and see what's going on. Sometimes its not anything special. But often, there is something happening with the way the poetry is being shared, with the way the story is being shaped that is designed to make an impression on you.

In verse 3, Moses decides to turn aside to see 'this great thing.' Then in verse 4, God notices that Moses has turned aside. Hmmm. Maybe there's something to this turning aside. Before God will speak to Moses, before Moses will have this landmark encounter with God, he first has to turn aside. He has to change directions, to adjust his trajectory, to take a new aim.

Moses could just go on with his life. He could just keep chasing that wandering lamb, keep thinking about the things on his shepherd-to-do list. He could keep focused, keep the main thing being the main thing, he could refuse to deviate from the path.

And he would miss out on a once-in-a-Bible moment.

Moses has to look in a new place. He has turn and see what God is doing. He has to be willing to be interrupted, to be redirected, to be changed. Moses has to let God get his attention. He has to be willing to relinquish his agenda, wish-list, daily routine and be aware of what God is doing on the side, out of view and outside of the usual.

So, maybe there's something there for us to grab on to - we who live in a rushed-pace, hurry-hurry world with more to do that we can finish. Maybe there's a bit of a correction there for our over-saturated, entertainment-saavy, app-addicted eyes. What would God have to do to get our attention? How hard would it be for God to interrupt your schedule, draw your eyes and speak to you?

Exodus: When God Works Without Making a Sound

Notice in the story, early on, how the oppressed are resisting, if only in small pockets, the power, might and will of Pharaoh: Moses' mother won't let him be killed by Pharaoh. She puts Moses in the river. Pharaoh's own family is subverting his will, as his daughter rescues the baby, adopts him (Pharaoh can't be ignorant of this) and then, unwittingly, hires Moses' own mother to nurse him - using royal treasury to work against the royal decree.

Here, God stands, silently, quietly, with the weakest, most helpless in the story - the mothers and their newly born babies. God blesses the Hebrew midwives who resist the forces of death through refusing to carry out Pharaoh's orders and lying to him when confronted. Exodus puts God's sovereignty on display, but in a very unexpected way - through the brave, courageous, desperate, attached mothers, a young girl and a foreign princess who willingly resists her own Father. These 'heroes' of the faith practice covert disobedience, dishonesty, hiding a child and noncompliance in adopting, caring for and raising an intended victim. Suddenly, the all-powerful Pharaoh and his vast array of resources, power and dread cannot stop the fulfillment of God's covenant and the rescue of God's community.

Moses' going out and seeing changes his life forever. [Here's a link to the text in Exodus] Direct exposure to the poverty, injustice and oppression leads him to react with violence. He tries his hand at resolving the conflict. "His hand" is critically important to understand. Note that Moses' attempt for resolution is rooted in Pharaoh's system - violence, authority. And the Israelite workers see through this - they don't respect him, they see him as belonging to the cult of power still, as a violent man acting the same as the Egyptians.

"Seeing" is greatly important in this story. Seeing the beautiful baby causes Pharaoh's daughter to act differently. Seeing the oppression incites Moses to action. Seeing his trust in violence and power cause the Israelites to distrust Moses. Seeing their disdain breaks the spirit of Moses, humbles him and sends him running. Seeing something can lead us to change, to rethink our assumptions or expectations, to see ourselves in a new light. Seeing a new family begins to change the trajectory of Moses' life. Seeing God as Sinai changes who Moses knows himself to be.

And its interesting what we don't see or hear from God in the midst of Moses' violent act. Moses kills and the reproach on him is from the people - not from God. Best we can tell, God never says a word to Moses about it. Is this because Moses already knows the depth of his sin? Is this because God is okay with the killing of the oppressor? Is it because the judgment of the people speaks God's word? Is God waiting until handing out the commandments on Sinai - remember it is Moses who gets the word, "Thou shalt not kill" long before anyone else does.

Terrible violence will be visited on the violent, oppressive Pharaoh and his regime, but it will come directly from God, not through the hand of a man. Moses is acting towards a justice and liberation for the children of Abraham, but it is an attempt to bring out that justice and liberation by his own hand, rather than through faith, through dependence upon God and through a direct confrontation with the oppressive authority. Killing the Egyptian who is beating or killing the Hebrew is an act of violence, not an act of justice. Moses is relying on what he's learned of Pharaoh's way to try to bring about justice. He already knows this can't turn out well, or why else would he bury the body? The justice of God brings issues into light and into the open, not hiding them away under the sand in secrecy.

God hears the cry of the oppressed, remembers his commitment to the hurting and vulnerable community, and begins to act - outside of the system, in the margins and unseen places, to correct and rescue and renew.

Moses runs away to the desert - to exile. He's on the run, on the lam, hiding from the powers that Be. Moses is an outcast, a fugitive. He is in a prison himself - away from his home, hiding from his father the oppressor and alone in many ways. Moses is a minimum-wage worker in the dessert land where no one else wants to work - on the border between civilization and the wilderness. This is when God shows up directly. How and when does God call on Moses as an agent of liberation? Not until after he has been groomed to adulthood, tried to solve the problem out of a position of power and privilege, failed, lost his standing, safety and identity and begun living on the margin where he can find God's story, God's community and the humbleness to follow the leading of God.

The well is a pastoral scene in biblical imagery (think of Jesus with the woman at the well or the servant of Abraham who goes to get a wife for Isaac - Gen 24:10-21) or Jacob meeting Rachel at the well - Gen 29:9-12). This is both pastoral (a scene for life) but also a little romantic. Its not at all surprising, either in terms of culture or narrative, that the next sentence after Moses gets to the well shows a daughter walking up.

But the next scene is an interruption - the daughter is run off by bandits/shepherds (notorious riff-raff in ancient times). Moses, acting as a savior, runs off the shepherds, resuces the daughter and even waters the herd. There is a word play in the text, "watered" their flock. The one who was drawn from the water, who will draw Israel through the water here draws water affecting a resuce of his future wife.

Isn't it interesting that Moses is again in verses 21 and 22 being taken into someone else's home? He doesn't make his own home, he's brought into someone else's. Reuel immediately offers this Sojourner hospitality. There's something about him as outsider protecting the daughters and serving the needs of the family (watering the flocks) that makes him a suitable suitor to his daughter. He sees something in Moses - something directly tied to what has driven Moses to the desert in the first place. After all, the same 'jump to action' mindset that made him a criminal and outcast in Egypt, makes him a hero here in the desert.

God shows up in the prison of the dessert, in the midst of Moses' fugitive way. God reveals his compassion for his people and his desire to renew the covenant and rescue the people to an outcast, unsuccessful, half-breed murderer. God takes the wandering exile into "his camp" with this new family to make him his own. It will take a lifetime for Moses to become the deliverer God is looking for. And at least part of that process involves being out of the Egyptian systems and thinking and life for a while. The withdrawal is not a hatred of all things Egypt - its exile. But this exile ends up being a time of 'detox' from Pharaoh's empire and rethinking and discovery and conversion. God must remake the deliverer in a new image, a new light.

Of course, this isn't new to us, is it? God is in the business of giving people new homes, new perspective, new ways to see the world, a new mission and a new hope. God is in the business of bringing people into a family where they taste God's acceptance and transforming presence and join Him in his mission to the world. God get involved long before we recognize it, shapes us into his vessels for hope, courage, grace and justice and then calls on us to make His mission our own. That's change you can believe in!

Exodus: Those God-Fearing Women

Exodus unleashes a dramatic, almost cinematic, conflict between this amazing and awe-inspiring source of life, order, hope and liberation that we know as God with the embodiment of tyranny and pointlessness epitomized by Pharaoh. God brings both the source and strength of life, both the beauty and the blessings of living. Pharaoh brings to life disdain, manipulation, oppression and the demeaning of the foreigner, hardship born out of hatred and everything that is entirely un-human.

Into this explosive struggle the Scripture shines a light with the bold courage of the most unlikely of sources: two Hebrew midwives. These two women, out of a fear of God, resist Pharaoh’s charge to kill new born boys and refuse this powerful despot. See Exodus 1:17.

What is the nature of this ‘fear’ that could motivate such courageous dissent?

The Rabbis of Jewish tradition understand two kinds of fear. A lesser fear is a fear of consequences, a worry about outcome. “If I do this, God will be angry.” Such a motivation is view as immature and not really worth of the realm of true faith and holiness.

Noble fear or holy fear is not the fear of consequences. Fear of the Lord, Holy fear, noble fear is an awareness of God, an attentiveness to who God is in all of his splendor, might, mercy, wisdom and being.

Psalm 111: Praise the LORD. (literally, Hallelu Yah)
I will extol the LORD with all my heart in the council of the upright and in the assembly.
Great are the works of the LORD; they are pondered by all who delight in them.
Glorious and majestic are his deeds, and his righteousness endures forever.
He has caused his wonders to be remembered; the LORD is gracious and compassionate.
He provides food for those who fear him; he remembers his covenant forever.
He has shown his people the power of his works, giving them the lands of other nations.
The works of his hands are faithful and just; all his precepts are trustworthy.
They are steadfast for ever and ever, done in faithfulness and uprightness.
He provided redemption for his people; he ordained his covenant forever—holy and awesome is his name.
(all building to this conclusion:)
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding.
To him belongs eternal praise.

Notice how the Psalm builds, crescendos in a revelation about who God is, about what God has done. The ultimate conclusion after all this praise and wonder is a revelation about the Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.

And oh my, do we need wisdom. Wisdom is making a decision that walks with God, that keeps me in the pathways of righteousness, that helps me see God’s face or hear God’s song. Wisdom is God’s direction in my life, God’s counsel at my side. Rules are for those who can’t make a decision, like a four-year-old or a low-level employee who doesn’t understand the values of the company, or for a society that won’t live out the Golden Rule. Wisdom trumps rules, transcends them. Wisdom looks beyond ‘right and wrong’ and looks for best, noblest, healthiest, purest, holiest.

This is awe that emerges from the contemplation of God’s incomparability, greatness and magnificence. It involves marvel, wonder and awe. This involves an awareness of God that stretches the imagination, boggles the mind, upends the ordinary view of the world and yet calms the soul. Fear of heaven is a step toward liberation of the soul. A soul that trembles before human displays of might, power, influence or promise is one that has not really apprehended the vastness of the cosmos, the frailty of even the most imposing personage, the sheer wonder of Gods’ life and the awesomeness and greatness of God’s very being.

Fear of God sees Pharaoh for who he really is – simply another human being, seeking to silence his own fear and fragility by bullying the weak. It was their awe and wonder at God’s greatness that imbued these women with clarity about their own capabilities and responsibilities to shine God’s light in a murky and hurting world. It was their own marveling at God and sense of awe at God’s rule and reign that wouldn’t let them compromise, even an inch, on Pharaoh’s command.

Fear of God puts insecurities in perspective, worries reduced in size, empty promises are revealed, moral failures clear and the priorities of my life are measured.

Fear of God reminds me that God is more – God is more than me, more than anyone I’ll ever meet, more powerful, more accepting, more loving, more demanding, more capable, more forgiving, more faithful, more challenging, more just, more merciful, …more. God lives more, does more, gives more and expect more. Live with that in mind – and you’re living in the Fear of the Lord.

Knock Knock

One of my seminary professors posted this short video by Michael Reed James on Facebook.

Wow.

"Yes, we are our fathers' sons and daughters, but we are not their choices."

Amazing work going on in his poetry and in him.

Decorating yourself and Growing Up

There's a recurring theme showing up in my daughter's life, and its taken a new turn in recent days. She is a decorator. She has always decorated paper, her room, her books, her wall. Give her a crayon, marker, pencil or a make-your-own-card set and something got decorated. Creativity - check!

Now, she's taken to decorating herself. Her shoes a couple weeks ago. It was highlighters on her hands and face Wednesday at school and on our Daddy-Daughter date. And without any warning, it was eyeshadow this morning. Oh sure, the eyeshadow didn't make it all the way to school, (got wiped off while we breakfasted at Panera - her idea) but even putting it there is a big deal.

We've dragged our heals on the wearing of makeup for a while really. Heck, we dragged our heals on earrings, grown-up clothes, a cell-phone and everything else of accelerated adolescence and pre-adulthood. I don't have a problem with her growing up. Now, I'm not crazy about letting go of the sweet, innocent, little-girl days we enjoyed or the amazing, very-successful late-elementary phase that was so fun. But, growing up is part of the package. In fact, if she wasn't growing up, we'd be worried.

We just haven't pushed the 'grown-up' stuff. I don't mind little girls wearing ear rings or a kid painting their face or the fact that girls are going to play dress up and make-up. I have just never been a fan of pushing kids into adulthood before actual adulthood. The days of those stresses and strains will come fast enough. Let them be children, enjoy the days of playing with dolls, kick the soccer ball, discovering the rules and being a kid.

Yes, she's growing up at a faster pace that I usually notice. But for the record, I like how she's growing. She's watching, listening, thinking. She's being creative, staying with the schoolwork, enjoying the friendships and still dreaming about the future. I'm hopeful that the seeds of faith we've planted will grow and that she'll nurture what she finds there. And I trust God to walk with her as she writes this story her own way.